How to Not Approach a Girl

Since I’m spending my spring break in San Diego (I have to teach and tutor at the high school), I thought I will kill some time by going to Starbucks and catching up on work.
I snagged a table and dove into this dumb teaching log I have to fill out.
So I am just sitting there, headphones in, and about an hour into working, I look over and the guy next to me is saying something to me.
I remove my headphones and here’s what goes down:

Guy: What are you studying?

Me: I’m not studying, I’m entering data for this teacher log thing.

Guy: You’re a teacher?

Me: Well, no. I’m a student teacher…

Guy: That’s cool…that’s unusual.

Me: Ya. (Teaching is unusual?)

Me: What are you studying? (Why did I reciprocate this question?)

Guy: Bio..I’m in med school. I want to be a doctor and actually help people.

Me: Oh, okay. (First of all, rude.)

Fifteen minutes later…

Guy: What ethnicity are you?

Me: Um..English…like from England.

Guy: Just wondering.

Me: Weird

Twenty minutes later…

Guy: This is going to be an awkward question, but what religion are you?

Me: Christian…why?

Guy: You don’t wanna know. Sorry for the awkward question.

Me: No problem…happens every day (no it doesn’t…)

Guy: Sorry, it’s just the first question I ask when I want to date a girl, since I’m Jewish.

Me: Ohh, got it. (Ya, right after you ethnically profile her.)

Guy: Do you have a boyfriend?

Me: Yes

Guy: Of course. That should probably be the first question I ask.

Me: Ya, probably…

And this guy got into med school…he’s going to be somebody’s doctor.
Just think about it.

Speaking of awkward…

  1. Kevin said:

    haha wow now I know why you didn’t want to tell me over the phone. This is crazy and rude. You should have not paid attention to him at all ha

  2. Brynn, Your blog is hilarious. I just cracked up inside reading this…so funny.

  3. Melissa said:

    hahahaha THAT is exactly why I don’t go to the doctor. WOW.

  4. Mom said:

    This is hysterical. You should have come back with something witty – like, “well, let me give you a piece of advice – I want to be a teacher and I “actually” want to help people – so I’m going to start with you. Go home and figure out a “new approach,” cause if I had been single – your grade would have been “F.”

  5. Andrew Ruiz said:

    oh wow! what coffee shoppe was this at?!

  6. Beryl Gunn/Grandma said:

    So even after he found out that you were RU (religiously unsuitable) he still went on to ask if you had a boyfriend! What would the next question have been if you had said, “No”? I hate to think – what a jerk!

  7. Hmm. I’ll give him one small point of clever. The ethnicity question was probably an attempt to find out if you were Jewish without asking the religious question up front.

    You and Sharideth and a few of the other bloggers should get together to write a book of bad pickup lines. :>

    • Brynn said:

      Good point. Maybe he could just pass out a survey to potential suitors he spots at coffee shops…it could be a real time saver. šŸ˜›

  8. Ha! Great Minds Think Alike! I almost included the survey form suggestion on that comment.

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