My Diary, Pt. 2

Here’s another excerpt from my old diary, and it’s just as insightful as the last one.

Transcription:

Boys Are Jerks!! (especially the ones in my family!)
3 Reasons

1. Max always gets his way, and if he doesn’t he hurts people

2. Ian throws a fit when I put away my barbies!

3. Get a load of this! Dad said “no” when I asked him if he liked the doll I made in girl scouts.

“Boys are made of greasy grimy gopher guts, mutilated monkey meat, dirty little birdie feet.  Girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice, thats what girls are made of!!” Thats what I think of boys and some girls.-Brynn

Analysis:

  1. While reason #2 may have been proof to nine-year-old Brynn that boys are jerks, today it’s just blackmail.
  2. #3…. Seriously dad? Did you have to say no? I could have been a professional doll-maker. But no, you crushed that dream.
  3. The saying at the bottom- I think this was one of the “official rhymes” in my Boy-Haters Club (formed circa 1997, membership: 2 people).  The official song was “Rockin’ Robin”.
  4. Is it really any wonder that I didn’t get a boyfriend until I was almost 18?
  5. Notice the qualifier I included after the rhyme: “and some girls”.  Is it any wonder that I only had one friend?
  6. Notice my organization with this list.  One piece of evidence for each male in my family.  I bound for academic success.

Stay tuned for more mediocre entries from my elementary school diary.

What songs are you currently obsessed with?

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